The rest of FEBURARY

OK here we go. Month by Month!

Feb 8

Ryker's 11 Birthday was kickstarted by a stack of pancakes. I remember not being able to find the candles so I improvised with tea lights. 

11 years old! My goodness. And where to begin with the love I have for this boy? He is such a light in my life. For example, the week before his before I was feeling overwhelmed with what I needed to get done in that particular day. I found a note on my mirror that was encouraging me that I could do it. He reminded me that he loves me and that God loves me. His spirit is a strong one and I believe God has big things in store for him. I love him to the heavens and back. 

 He went of to school that day and then that night I took him on a little birthday date. He was growing out of all of this church clothes, so I took him shopping for some new church clothes.

 Then dinner at Pizza Pie Cafe

 ...and a movie.  We started these one-on-one dates a few years ago and I really do love being able to get that time with him. Makes my heart SUPER happy!

 That Sunday he celebrated with my side of the family. That same day he gave a talk in Primary and nailed it. I helped him put an outline together for his talk, but he pretty much wrote the whole thing himself. I wish I could have recorded it because he looks and acts like a young missionary up there. So confident and full of the Light of Christ!

 Ryker got the hoverboard he's been asking for since before Christmas. He got right on it and made it look easy. Still can't believe he's getting so grown up.

Feb 9

I have made a new friend over the past couple of years. Jenny Noall is in our ward and we have grown closer and closer. Which it's funny because we have so many things NOT in common. But yet we find ourselves enjoying being together. We have 3 kids all about the same ages and a love for the gospel. She's been one of those friends that I can go on a long walk with and we can talk about anything. Someone who I can share my spiritual experiences with and my bad moments.

 Feb 14- Valentine's Day

Jesse wrote me a cute candy-gram that made me smile. It reads...

"Ash, Even though I may drive you BANANAS and sometimes you want to PUNCH me, because I don't call you BABY without SNICKER, I love you so EXTRA LONG. You bring me MOUNDS of JOY. I was a big SMARTIE and got a big PAYDAY when I snagged you because you are totally MINT! Happy Valentine's Day! Love you! Sorry you can eat any of this. -Jesse"

He's seriously the best

 The boys both worked really hard on their Valentines Boxes. I was very proud of their creativity by making them all by themselves and coming up with the ideas. Cyrus built a soccer field and Ryker created an under the sea box. 

 That night I surprised the 4 "valentines" in my life to a candle lit dinner.

I served Sparkling Apple Cider to start, Artichokes for an appetizer, Pan seared Sirlion and Fillet with Roasted Butternut squash for the main course, and finished off with oce cream in a heart shape.

 We started as soon as Jesse got home from acadamy. So as soon as he came in I had it dark with soft music playing. After we were done eating we took turns telling each other what we loved about each other. I remember my heart feeling so full as I sat there really feeling the joy of that moment. The love was so thick and I felt so grateful for these boys.

I think this was my favorite Valentines Day so far and would like to make it a traditional thing.

 Feb 19-
I thankfully have an Instagram account that I'm able to collect some of my thoughts and feelings about life. That day I wrote this...
"It was a year ago today that I found out my best friend Harmoni received her new calling to serve on the other side of the veil. She has left a continual impression on my heart ever since."

"I still wear my Harmoni necklace everyday (it'll probably rust off me before I ever take it off). I still exercise with the same passion that she awoke in me 8 years ago (we exercised together every day for many years). I go to the temple every week, just like she did and loved."

"I love my Savior like she does.
I love my family like she does.
She will forever be in my heart!
And I still have those moments that I bawl my eyes out because I just miss her so much! I often imagine what it'll be like when we meet again and oh she better be ready for the biggest hug ever! Love you Harm!
I AM FOREER HARMSTRONG!"

 I went to her grave to visit.

 And bring her a little Valentines Love!

 And I just cried and cried.

 Feb 22-

Fynn is always doing the funniest things.  On this particular day I was laughing at him after telling him he couldn't play on the kindle fire. I found him in his room ...all quiet like... on the book shelf...playing with the kindle.  Sneaky little dude.

 Looking back on this photo and I remember it being that last time I went to the temple for several months. I had established a weekly habit of going to the temple, and about the end of Feb when Jesse's academy got more and more intense for him. Which in reality got more and more intense for me at home with the boys.

I will say that I had to find peace within the phrase "A time and a season for all things". Because I just fell into the season of not being able to go to the temple as often as I was before. And that's ok. My focus was on taking care of Jesse!

With that said I wanna quote Boyd K Packer "At the temple the dust of distraction seems to settle out, the fog and the haze seem to lift, and we can 'see' things that we were not able to see before and find a way through our troubles that we had not previously known."

There is something so renewing that comes from stepping away from the world and into the House of God. I leave feeling happy and peaceful. Calm, steadfast... and clear in my realm.